Photos That Prove Marriage Is A War And We Don’t Know Who’s Winning
When you get married, you're agreeing to spend decades of your life with your new spouse. If you're lucky, you're going to be with them for the next 50 or 60 years, so you've got to be able to keep things interesting, right?
While you may not always love the practical jokes that your husband pulls, and your wife will never share her dessert with you, your life would be boring without them.
There's No Point In Debating It
You're never going to win the battle when it comes to thinking that something is more painful than childbirth. Even if the physical pain is worse, you still didn't form a person inside of you, so she's going to win
Never Leave Your Husband In Charge
You sent him to the grocery store for milk and kitty litter, but instead, he came back with a car full of treats that a 7-year-old boy would've picked out. Now you're left wondering if there's a return policy on husbands.
There Can Only Be One Winner
One man's wife claims that Pepsi is superior to Coke and thinks he shouldn't be able to buy it anymore because it's a waste of money to buy both, so he showed her how he really feels.
Good Luck Changing The Channel Now
You always fight over the remote and your wife always wins control of the clicker, but she can't win if she can't reach it, so use your height to your advantage.
Sound The Alarm
After a late night out with your friends, you thought you were going to be able to sneak into the house without your wife knowing just how late you came home. But thanks to this trap she put on the door, you're sure to wake her up.
Cherish This Moment
Very few times in your marriage is your wife going to admit when she was wrong, so you need to take those little chances and embrace the moment when you can.
The Answer Is Probably No
Robbie's wife is sick and tired of having to clean up a mess in the kitchen every time her husband wants to make himself a snack, and she is sick of being asked, so she came up with a solution.
Boundaries Don't Exist
When there's an important question to be asked, it can't wait for things like showering. Your husband needs answers, and he needs them as soon as possible, so get used to him storming in.
The Secret To A Happy Marriage
While you might think that they'd want to ride in the same car and bask in their newlywed bliss, these two have clearly figured out the secret to a happy marriage is a little healthy distance.
Lines Have Been Drawn
When it comes to cake or really any type of dessert, there's no messing around. You're lucky she let you have any of it, let alone half of it. Appreciate what you got and move on.
It's Payback Time
Being married to someone means you have one person in your life that knows you so well they can always find a way to annoy you, but it also means you have ample time to come up with a creative solution.
You Sure Showed Her
Your wife asked you to mow the lawn because you're in charge of doing the yard work, which means you get full creative control, and now she's stuck looking at this out the window every day.
Allergy Season Is Also Petty Season
I pledge my full-fledged support to this wife. Husbands always want to think they're above the power of prescription medicine. They're the same men who refuse to use an umbrella.
Peanut Butter And Puzzle Pieces
This husband thought he was being funny when his wife said she didn't care what shape her sandwich was cut into, but in the end, it seems like the wife was the winner. This seems like it took more time than it was worth for hubby.
Why Would The Guests Be In The Attic?
You don't know where your guests are going to go snooping when you're not looking! Some people like to look in the medicine cabinet, but if they choose to snoop in the attic, then you'll be thrilled.
This Is How You Start A Fight
If you go around living your life happily eating the tops off of all the muffins in your house and expecting to face zero consequences in life, you're in for a rude awakening.
Waking Up Next To Each Other Seems Great At First
Except when you have completely different schedules, or worse, you married an early riser. Now the mornings are lawless. Will they wake you up with their cheery disposition or will they let you sleep until after you've snoozed your alarm fifty times?
Eating For Two
When they say you're eating for two, they don't generally mean that you should eat your husband's food as well as yours, but I guess if you're sending out a creative pregnancy announcement, that's one way to get the message across.
No Wonder He Hasn't Lost Weight
All these times that you heard the treadmill running in the basement, you thought your husband was working out. But now you discover he's been doing...this. Your marriage is built on lies.
Thanks For The Effort...
If you want something done properly, you might as well do it yourself. This is especially true when you ask your significant other to help with something and they do a bad job on purpose so you hopefully will never ask them again.
She Brought This On Herself
She's always told you that making the bed in the morning is your job, and you know that if you don't do it you're going to hear about it all day, so what choice did you have?
If You Can't Beat 'Em, Join 'Em
You should already be prepared for the fact that, while your wife is giving birth, she's probably going to remind you at some point that she's in this pain because of you. This husband came prepared and gave his wife another reason to yell in anger.
Two Can Play At This Game
Your wife said you weren't allowed to buy anymore fancy kitchen equipment, but she never said anything about office equipment. Lucky for you, a vacuum sealer sort of looks like a three-hole punch on your desk.
Use The Laser To Point Him In The Right Direction
Okay, so this might not be the "laser hair removal" your wife was expecting when she asked for it for Christmas, but this husband deserves a couple bonus points for creativity.
The Best Things In Life Aren't Free
You want to do something nice for your spouse, but you're not just going to do everything for her without a lil' something in return. You deserve your allowance for the week.
Jumpstart Her Heart Every Day
If you've been searching for the perfect way to give your wife a heart attack first thing in the morning, putting up a giant cardboard cutout proved to be very effective for this husband.
Follow The Instructions And You'll Be Fine
What more do you want from your wife? The kids are all still alive, everyone has been fed semi-healthy food. You can't expect any more than that on a regular basis.
Where's Your Holiday Spirit?
Your wife complained that you had the least festive house in the neighborhood every year when it was the Christmas season. Now, thanks to your little display, she'll take matters into her own hands in future years.
Are You Trying To Get Divorced?
No sane person would think that this is an acceptable way to cut a cake, right? The husband that did this is trying to pick a fight, and we have no doubt that this tactic proved to be a success.
A Thinly Veiled Threat
See, it seems like she's giving you a compliment, but any person who has been married for a long time knows that the part you should focus on is the second half of this note. The first part doesn't matter.
What Kind Of Monster Did You Marry?
When your wife asked you to share a Twix bar with her, you assumed like any normal person would, that she meant you get one half and she gets the other. That's not the case in this household.
Serious Suggestions Only, Please
When you told your husband that you were considering taking up a new hobby and were looking for suggestions, "extreme ironing" was—unsurprisingly—not one of the hobbies you'd initially thought of.
Now You Can Pick Up After Yourself
Most women are expecting to get some sort of fluffy, lovable ball of fur when they ask for a "golden retriever" for their birthday. A retriever painted gold was not on the list.
It's Always In Front Of The Spice Cabinet Too
If you every need to draw out literal fighting territories, it's going to be in the kitchen. No matter how spacious your kitchen is, you an always get in each other's way.
How To Stay Sane While Snacking
You have to bring your A-game when it comes to snacking in a relationship. Hide the best snacks or else they WILL eat them. For most men, you can just hide it on a bottom shelf because they're incapable of looking past eye-level.
So, Apparently This Happens In Real Life
Our parents always scare you into separating clothes but no one actually does as an adult. I hope whoever threw in the red shirt is forgiven by their spouse, because it's just not fair.
They're NOT Your Sandwich Maker
This man made the mistake of jokingly referring to his wife as a "sandwich maker," so she lived up to her name, and while she may have laughed at the time, she clearly didn't forget about it.
A Pointed Gift
You may have thought that subtlety was your strong suit, but then you realize that despite your hints and comments, your husband is still using the counter as a cutting board, so for Christmas you had to throw subtlety to the wind.
The Art Of War
Living with another person and knowing everything about them is great because you know how to make them smile, but it also means you know exactly how to annoy your wife when she tries to pick a fight with you.
How Does She Have Any Hair Left?
You're going to find yourself wondering how it's possible that your wife has any hair left to leave around the house considering you could form a small dog from all her shedding, but it's going to be a never-ending battle for you.
